Go out and see this

Early on in Jonathan Caouette's new autobiographical documentary, Tarnation we learn that due to a drug-related incident when he was an adolescent, he suffers from a psychological disorder that causes him to experience himself as if he were a character in a movie.

I, on the other hand, suffer from a psychological disorder which causes me to be inordinately fascinated with people whose belief they are characters in a movie leads to expose themselves on camera in a way I would never do.

Needless to say, Tarnation is my favorite new film since Games People Play. Comparing a tawdry sexploitation reality-tv movie to a gorgeously crafted 20 year labor of love may seem unfair, but keep in mind that in both cases we are sitting down in the dark to entertain ourselves with other people's traumas. Keep in mind also that Caouette's film caught the eye of Executive Producer Jonathan Cameron Mitchell when Caouette sent him a video tape audition for Mitchell's new film which included footage of Caouette and his boyfriend having sex.

Caouette's film is genuinely moving, particularly his relationship with his mother, and watching someone grow up on camera is always an unnerving, surreal experience, like those time-release films of a seed germinating. Tarnation worth it alone for the chilling footage of an 11-year old Caouette's performing an abused wife; the frame of a fictional character is already his instinctive vehicle for dealing with his own pain which would otherwise overwhelm him.

It is telling that, towards the end of the film, the adult Caouette tries but cannot repeat the confession performance. In this age when we are all performances of ourselves, an age Caouette seems to have been prepared and preparing for his whole life, there is no fictional frame left to seek refuge in.